A couple of months ago I made the mistake of saying "Oh, I don't plan on ever...." Haha....never tell God you won't do something...He will change your plans! Well, these plans that God changed involved me pursuing a credentialing in ministry..honestly something I never thought I'd do, but God can so quickly change your life...and the ride of life is so much easier when you obey and trust Him. In the midst of helping coordinate kids camp registration for the state AND planning VBS...all happening in the same month - I also had to study and take a test AND be interviewed by our district superiors.
Things have gone smoothly in all areas of camp, VBS and following God's lead into the next step in my ministry life...but I've been struggling with my thoughts. It's so hard for me to submit to these individuals who graded my test and interviewed me....knowing they are looking at me...getting to decide whether I am "approved" to do something God called me to do. On the other hand these are men, who follow Christ, making sure people are following the boundaries needed for being in ministry. I don't doubt the men, but I do wrestle with having to get these guys to like me. It's in God's hands, it's his timing, his plan...I'm just his clay pot...but by jiminny...I don't like the thought I have to measure up to peoples standards!
I'm feeling much better now that I went through the process - less judged than I thought I would feel. The interview was far less invasive and scary as I built it up in my mind. I was so worried I was in tears minutes before we (hubby & myself) were led into the office. Thankfully the sweet receptionist was so encouraging, helpful and understanding - she put us as ease. The verse from camp last week is so appropriate for this situation Romans 8:28 "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."
If God says "all things." He means it! It comes down to a simple choice: either we trust God, or we play God. (The Best of The Word for You Today Vol 5 by Bob Gass)
I'm not sure how I can put into words the fact that I was following God's will, so I wasn't being judged by man, but my judgment comes from God...in how well my heart, mind and actions jumped into line with God's will. It is fun to look back at where God has taken you and know you were in his will.
This morning I was reading in my daily Message Bible in Luke 6 and came across this passage that jumped out at me:
"Count yourself blessed every time someone cuts you down or throws you out, every time someone smears or blackens your name to discredit me. What it means is that the truth is too close for comfort and that that person is uncomfortable. You can be glad when that happens—skip like a lamb, if you like!—for even though they don't like it, I do . . . and all heaven applauds. And know that you are in good company; my preachers and witnesses have always been treated like this."
Luke 6:22-23 The Message
"Blessed are you when men hate you, when they exclude you and insult you and reject your name as evil, because of the Son of Man. Rejoice in that day and leap for joy, because great is your reward in heaven. For that is how their fathers treated the prophets"
Luke 6:22-23 NIV
